It is that time of year again. The stores are pimping out their chocolate hearts, the florists are promising that the right bouquet will keep you out of the doghouse, and the ultimate romantic comedy, “The Vow” hit the theaters the weekend before the “big day”. This movie is even more romantic, if possible, than PS. I Love You, because no one dies. (I hope. I haven’t seen it yet!)
Here I am on the eve of the biggest day of the year that ‘celebrates love’, and I am single. I expected to feel differently. Some years I have had boyfriends who lavished me with thoughtful gifts and took me out on meaningful dates. Some years I struggled through Valentine’s wondering if I was as into the relationship as the man was. Some years I had just started to see someone new, and the pressure of the holiday made the blossoming relationship feel awkward. (Do you get them something? Is it too much? Not enough?) And this year, like some years, I am single. Completely and totally without a Valentine. I expected to feel differently.
In no way do I feel like I need to go and buy myself a box of chocolates in order to console myself about my “condition”. Nor do I feel the urge to hunker down under my favorite blanket and rent romantic comedies, while lamenting over my single status. The only thing I am currently lamenting is the toothache I have had for 3 days, but that is emotionally pain free.
Is it weird that I am breathing a sigh of relief that I did not have to fight the crowds at the malls, Walgreens Drug Store, or the ultimate Valentine’s Day hub for ‘reasonably priced gifts’, Walmart? In fact, I used the money I would have spent on a gift for a boyfriend to take one of my dear friends to get a manicure and pedicure with me this last weekend!
There are a few men that I am currently speaking to online that seemed to want to secure me as a Valentine this year. I didn’t take any up on their offers; instead offering to meet later on this week, after Valentine’s Day is a memory, and all the chocolates and goodies are 50 percent off on clearance. Working at a middle school I have witnessed first-hand, that crazy last ditch effort to have a Valentine. Any Valentine. Doesn’t that prove you are desirable? Loveable? Worthy?
I expected to feel some kind of a longing for love, but instead I feel peace and contentment. I feel loved and worthy already…by my family, friends, and my God. Deep down there is that knowledge that when the right person comes along, I can celebrate that love, no matter what day of the year it is. For all of you that are single too, that is my wish for you this Valentine’s Day. For all my attached and married friends- I hope that your time of celebrating is special.
Much love to you all!